Why I Hate the Freak
by fayetonic
Summary: Reflections from a bitter Muggle.


Title: Why I Hate the Freak

Author: fayetonic

Challenge: FAP Dudley Dursley has an eye on Luna Lovegood

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. No profit is being made… just trying to have a little fun

Author's Note: This is a one-sided Dudley/Luna, and hints at Harry/Luna. Thanks to Spookykat for the beta. I really appreciate it, Spooky. You're the best beta out there! Thanks also to DarkLadyofSlytherin for putting up with my moaning, and helping with my tense issues. Thanks also to Platy, you rock.

Dudley Dursley is a normal sixteen-year-old boy with normal sixteen-year-old tendencies. He likes to sleep late, pig out on fast food, drink, smoke, and occasionally harass the kids in Little Whining Park. To say Vernon and Petunia Dursley are proud of their son is an understatement. Dudley knows that in their opinion, he is the best son in the whole wide world who can do no wrong, as cliched as it sounds. He uses this fact to his advantage. It has gotten him anything he's ever wanted. Except, of course, a Harry-Potter-Free existence.

Harry Potter (Dudley's cousin) on the other hand, can be described in one word: freak. In Dudley's opinion, Harry is nothing but than an ungrateful little brat who can wave a stick and float a cake causing not only damage to Vernon's reputation, but also costing Dudley a new video game. It doesn't matter to Dudley that Mrs. Whatever-Her-Name-Is's clothes are ruined, it matters that he did not receive the game _Mortal Combat_ when both Vernon and Petunia specifically promised it to him.

"He ruins everything!" Dudley would complain to his mother and father, while helping himself to another piece of cheesecake. The creamy morsels of velvety-sweet goodness were a small consolation for the fact that The-Boy-Who-Lives-To-Make-Life-Miserable would be picked up at King's Cross station the next day.

"I know, Sweetums," Petunia would reply, with her mouth set in a narrow line. "But, we have to go pick up the boy. Otherwise those freak friends of his will come and do their _hocus pocus_."

"Y-You don't l-love me!" a fake tear wells up in his eye, trailing down his chubby cheek.

"Dudders, don't cry! Mummy will buy you that cellular you wanted, Popkins," coosPetunia.

Dudley sniffles a couple of times, but inwardly he smirks in triumph.

A couple of hours later, Mr. Dudley Dursley of Number Four Privet Drive walks out of the Shopping Center carrying a brand new shiny Nokia cellular phone.

"Diddly-dum!" a shrill voice calls. "Sweetheart, we're over here!"

Sighing, Dudley turns and starts to walk towards the direction of his parent's car. Later in the car, while driving to King's Cross Train Station to pick up The Freak, Dudley fiddles with his new phone while bobbing his head to the new song on the radio. Strangers on the freeway peer into the backseat window and watch as Dudley's three chins wobble. Dudley pays them no mind.

When Vernon pulls into a parking spot, Dudley sighs again. He doesn't want to spend energy getting out of the car in order to greet Potter, but it beats sweating in the damn car. Damn the car for not having air conditioning and damn Potter for being a freak. Vernon really should get a new car, Dudley notes as he squeezes out through the backseat (which is not easy for somebody so big) and exits through the passenger side door.

Although Vernon parks as close as he possibly can, it's still a good distance from the car to the Train Station House. Dudley pants slightly, cursing Potter the whole way as he follows his father, wiping sweat from his brow. Getting inside the train station building is a task in and of itself. Dudley thinks of ways to get away with hurting Harry without acknowledging _his_ crowd. Dudley knew, as well as his parents did, that bad things happened if that freak's friends knew he was being given what he deserved. It takes a little over fifteen minutes for the Dursleys to get inside. Dudley doesn't understand why the _freak_ must come back on the busiest day of the week. After all, there were places to be, things to do, people to beat to a bloody pulp.

The Dursleys eventually stop at the crossroad between platforms nine and ten. It takes several minutes before Potter materializes from the brick wall. He's not alone. In the crowd of people, Dudley recognizes the freaky redheads, the bushy bucktooth girl, and the scarred guy with one eye. Dudley tries to stay brave but he cannot help but let out a small whimper. He fights the urge to cover his bottom. Dudley turns and watches as Harry kisses goodbye a blonde girl. When Harry pulls back, Dudley eyes the girl curiously.

She's a strange girl with scraggly waist-length blonde hair and large glassy gray eyes. She's an oddity, yet Dudley cannot look away even when she catches his eye. Dudley blushes slightly and the girl turns back to his cousin. Dudley eavesdrops slightly on their conversation.

"Goodbye, Harry Potter," the girl solemnly says, with a slight wistful smile on her lips.

"It's not forever goodbye, Luna," Harry replies, stroking her cheek. "I'll Owl you everyday."

Luna nods and they kiss one last time.

"Come on, Boy! We don't have all bloody day," Vernon snaps, and Harry rolls his eyes.

Pushing the trolley out the whole way, Harry follows his relatives out of the station.

Later, on the drive home, Dudley tries not to look at his cousin, but eventually fails.

"So, that was your girlfriend, eh?" Dudley sneers. "Didn't think you swung that way, Potter. What happened to your boyfriend, Cedric?"

Dudley notices Harry's shoulders tense.

"No, actually," Harry answered with a cheeky grin. "That was my friend Ron who drinks a potion once a month to be a girl. We wizards are much more advanced medically. He didn't even have to go to Sweden."

"Harry!" Petunia snaps.

_Oh, this is going to be good,_ Dudley thinks. _We're not even home yet and Potter's all ready in trouble. _

"You sure do get around, eh, Potter?" he says, unable to pass up an opportunity to egg him on. "You really ought to be more careful what with all those horrible diseases you can get. What does Cedric think? Is he all heartbroken?"

If he wasn't strapped down by a seatbelt, Dudley thinks he would have done a little jig because, as predicted, Potter tenses again.

"He's dead!" Harry snaps irritably, running a hand through his hair. "You leave Luna alone, _Big D_. Just sod off!"

"Watch your mouth, boy!" bellows Vernon, who's also glaring in the rearview window.

Harry shrugs his shoulders and mumbles something under his breath.

As the summer passes, owls are frequent in the Dursley household. Dudley does his best to ignore them, but sometimes can't help but wonder how that girl -Luna- is doing. Vernon and Petunia ignore the owls altogether. Which is surprising, but Dudley thinks it has something to do with Harry being able to perform magic legally.

One day, when Harry is out doing one thing or another, Dudley decides to snoop. His search comes to an end quickly, when he finds a piece of parchment on an old desk. It's a letter, written in a neat curvy script.

'_Dear Harry Potter,' _Dudley read silently.

_Daddy is most pleased that I did well on my OWLS. He's taking me on a surprise trip to Sweden! Can you believe it? Now, I'll be able to continue my search for Crumple Horned Snorkacks and Figging Fairies. I really wish you were here. I'm glad that your relatives aren't yelling at you. Your cousin looks like a sweet boy from what I've seen at Kings Cross. Have to go now; Daddy wants me to write an article for The Quibbler._

_Love,_

_Luna Lovegood_

The front door slams loudly from downstairs and Dudley hurriedly settles the parchment back onto the surface of the desk. Harry's light footsteps are heard treading up the stairs, and Dudley rushes into the bathroom across the hall. Closing the bathroom door, Dudley seats himself onto the porcelain toilet. He can't help but smile at the words Luna has written onto the parchment. Years later, the words would still echo throughout his conscience.

'_Your cousin looks like a sweet boy from what I've seen at Kings Cross.'_

Three years later, the Dursleys receive a wedding invitation by a familiar snowy owl.

'_You are cordially invited to the wedding of Harry James Potter and Luna Diana Lovegood. Please Owl A.S.A.P your RSVP.'_

Petunia almost throws the invitation away, until Dudley somehow convinces the family to go.

Weeks later, at the wedding, _she _is being handed off by her father. Dudley still has an eye on Luna Lovegood, also known now as Luna Potter.

For the record, Dudley still hates Harry for ruining everything.

'_Your cousin looks like a sweet boy from what I've seen at King's Cross'_, swims unbidden in front of his mind's eye after one too many beers at their wedding reception. Nobody thinks Dudley is a 'sweet boy' except for his parents, and they don't count.

He rather wishes she'd be Luna Dursley instead.


End file.
